Letters to Ramón the Mink of Love
Having trouble with the Love? Lost the Passion in your life? I am Ramón the Mink of Love, and my minkly wisdom has helped hundreds! Click here to be writing to me now!
Dear Ramón,
My mom was going through my old room in my parents' house, and she
found my high school porn stash! Now she'll barely talk to me, and
she refuses to look me in the eye. How can I smooth things over with
her?
Love,
"Awkward in Arkansas"
Dearest Awkward,
This is the perfect chance for the family bonding! After all, what
are you knowing about your mother's Kinks and Desires? What Positions
is she preferring? Is she the Dom or the Submissive? Sit down with her,
and watch and read the whole collection together. When you are finishing,
you will be knowing your mother much better than you are today.
Familially,
Ramón the Mink of Love
Dear Ramón,
I think i'm having too much sex. I'll do it at work, at home,
while I'm shopping—anywhere! Just today I did it with a guy
in a changing room at the mall. After every time, I feel really,
really guilty, but I just can't help myself. What's going on?
Love,
"Slutty in Santa Monica"
Dearest Slutty,
I, Ramón the Mink of Love, am
understanding this guilt perfectly well. It is so obvious! You
are Blessed with the Frequent Love, even as so many poor souls
around us are in Need. But it is so easy to be Sharing! Next
time the Man is Joining you in the dressing room, why not be
Inviting in the lady next door as well? Doing this, your guilt
will soon be disappearing.
Generously,
Ramón the Mink of Love
Dear Ramón,
My boyfriend's having trouble getting it up when we're in the sack.
He says it's stress, but I'm afraid I'm just not doing it for him
anymore. What can I do?
Love,
"Soft in St. Louis"
Dearest Soft,
Spend the hour surfing the adult sites on the Internet, recording all
of the audio. Burn them onto the CD, and be playing that beneath the Conjugal
Bed at the maximum volume. With all the moaning and groaning, he can not help
but to be Aroused.
Adamantinely,
Ramón the Mink of Love
Dear Ramón,
I've been with my boyfriend for about a year, and I think he's gay.
He's really effeminate, our sex life is terrible, and he gets really
touchy with other guys when he's had a lot to drink. How can I know
for sure?
Love,
"A Beard in Banff"
Dearest Beard,
What you are needing is the latex muscle suit and the false mustache.
Wear these to bed next time you are Making Love. If he is Enjoying this,
then he is probably being gay.
Manfully,
Ramón the Mink of Love