Creating the Carnal Candies

They are saying that the Life, it is like the Box of Chocolates. Both are Delicious and Delectable, and hopefully you will end up being covered head to foot in the Sweet Cream. But have you been noticing that most of the selections of chocolates are a little tame? Chocolate is one of the greatest Aphrodisiacs known, and yet the candies being offered by the mall chocolatiers are common and prosaic—not worthy to be giving to your Sweet, Sensitive Lover.

But the box of chocolates is the tradition on the Day of St. Valentine. So what chocolates should you be asking for? I, Ramón the Mink of Love, am most glad you asked! Here, I will be helping you.

The Coconut  
Unless you are Knowing the Lover very well, it is better to not be buying the coconut chocolates. Many people are disliking the taste, and it is not particularly Aphrodisiacal.

The Mint  
For the most part, the mint should be avoided. Although it can be cleansing the breath after the Long Night of Love, it is not having any great Amorous use.

The Caramel  
The caramel is not the good selection. It will only be gumming up your Lover's mouth, and preventing him or her from using it in the Lovemaking. Avoid it.

The Peanut Butter  
The peanut butter should most definitely not be present in the chocolates for the Lover. Not only is it sticking the mouth shut like the caramel, but it is often becoming the Gustatory Reminder of one's childhood and one's parents. Unless your Lover was having the Special Relationship with his or her mother, this is not the good idea.

The Walnuts  
The walnuts are a little better a choice than the other selections we have thus far been seeing. The ancient Romans were thinking them to be the most Potent Aphrodisiac, and perhaps they are still having some of this effect after all the millenia. However, as we will see there are better choices to be making.

The Liquor  
At last we are having the chocolate filling that will be helping you to Induce the Lover into Great Feats of Ecstasy. Unfortunately, most alcoholic chocolates are only containing the tiniest bit of booze, so that it will not be helping you much. Fortunately you can be remedying this by making the chocolates yourself. If you are making them the size of the tennis ball and filling them with the grain alcohol, you just might have enough to be Affecting him or her. However try not to be letting the alcohol be dissolving the chocolate.

The Pomegranate  
The pomegranate is the most wonderful natural Aphrodisiac, both Sweet and Inviting. The only problem is the red stain it is leaving behind. Of course, for some of the S&M Aficionados this may be a bonus. You just need to be ready to be bleaching the bed...if you were not going to be doing so already!

The Oyster  
The oysters are of course among the best known of the Foods of Aphrodite, exciting the Libidinous Passions in both the men and the women. Of course, there are some who are expressing the hesitance at trying them in the chocolate. No matter—if you are just adding the cocktail sauce, they will be going down Smooth and Creamy.

The Rocky Mountain “Oyster”  
For those of you who are living far from the sea, you can be finding the fresh oysters in the different way. The Rocky Mountain oysters are naturally filled with the full day's supply of testosterone, and their round shape means that they are easily coated in the chocolate candy. Soon they will have your Lover Heaving and Begging for the Sweet Release. Truly, they are Gonadalicious!

The Spanish Fly  
Unfortunately the Spanish fly has been becoming less popular of late, because of some naysayers and dullards complaining that it is poisonous and potentially fatal. Bah! Why I, Ramón the Mink of Love, am eating them by the fistful every morning for the breakfast! The insects are being very crunchy and delectable, and are having the pleasant aftertaste. And the aftereffects are Most Enjoyable!

The Viagra  
For those who do not wish to be eating bugs, you can always be taking the Pharmaceutical Approach. Take two of these, and be calling me in the morning! Of course, again there are some busybodies who are thinking that the Sildenafil citrate can be dangerous for those who are having the heart troubles or the diabetes. But what are they knowing? The Love, it is the best medicine of all, and the Passion will be preventing any medical emergencies from happening!

The Rhinoceros Horn  
It used to be that the rhinoceros horn was illegal to be cultivating, but fortunately now that the farmers are raising the cage-free, organic rhinoceroses, we can be partaking of this wonderful substance without the guilt. Powdered rhinoceros horn is a little bitter and chalky, but mixed in with the cream and the sugar, it is making the most Luscious and Scrumptious treat!

Hopefully this will be helping you to be Exciting your Lover in the New Ways! Happy Day of St. Valentine!